I was a serial monogamist. I would simply jump into exclusivity if HE wanted to. When app dating came to be everyone was saying it was “The Dating Apocalypse.” For me, it was very liberating to have a catalogue of men and have the choice to talk and meet up. However, that liberation and choice has its draw backs……
Is casual dating easy?….
In a word…no. You will go on bad dates and get rejected. It comes with the territory. There will be dry periods, hot streaks, and a casual bae here and there. All hopefully will be leading to the right partner, not a partner out of desperation. Also there is nothing wrong with simply being single, or “self-partnered” as actress Emma Watson coined.
A main guy, an alternate, and new dates are something to strive for….
In “casual,” you need options, yet you don’t want to only see strangers. It’s best to shoot for a main guy that you see, an alternate guy, and continue to go on new dates. It might not all line up at once, but it’s a good thing to strive for. When you have your energy in a lot of different places you don’t feel disappointed if a guy doesn’t text, or cancels. You don’t have a desperate energy and can simply enjoy meeting new men.
Be committed to the right guy…..
“love yourself first” can be a lot to ask. However, when you don’t view yourself as “prize” you will not be treated well or pick the right men. It is always better to do the inner work and be in an abundance mindset before you embark on finding a life partner. In the meantime, there are casual guys. Just don’t waste too much time on them.
I also give advice to men…..
Men who are seeking advice usually have good intentions. I have male friends who ask for a woman’s pespective on certain things. As a society we are confusing and telling men mixed messages in how they should behave.
Bottom Line….
Dating needs to be fun. You will be the most interesting friend at the brunch table. Don’t let your parents or friends pressure you to couple up. Deep down you know what’s best. We live in a more casual and open-to-explore dating world. Embrace it, don’t fight it. I have been in the dating trenches for years. With the crazy dates, dealing with F- boys, and men and their egos. I have gained insight and done research. Hopefully it can help you to feel more empowered and less stressed about dating.
Mostly Casual 