I want to talk about the gray area of needing some extra help. In the extremes, it is immensely important to seek professional help. I will not be speaking of crisis mode. I remember going to therapy for a five-year stretch and then hitting a wall. I treated therapy like a spoken-word- improv set. For anyone who needs a little boost, what are some alternative paths for feeling more centered?…..
If you are in therapy….
In the beginning of therapy, you might be in a trauma phase where you don’t know what is wrong. This is where therapy is great and helpful. However, near the end of my sessions, I felt I had to rehash old trauma that no longer affected my life to produce “content” for the session. Have notes of what you want to speak about versus speaking freely.
Consider a coach or mentor….
Seeking out a life coach might be laughed at in your circle of friends. But why? First of all, a therapist legally is not allowed to give you direct advice. You have to come to your own conclusions. In certain cases, such as making career or dating decisions, a direct yes or no is more helpful.
Exercise and breath work….
Most stress presents in the physical body. It is important to move your body daily and get some fresh air and sunshine. Breath work does not have to be an hour-long thing; it can be for five minutes a day.
Diet, sleep, routines….
Any way to dampen stress will be life-changing. Reconsider a stressful job or relationship. You should not be overwhelmed and stressed daily. This can mean quitting caffeine, junk food, and alcohol and prioritizing sleep and rest.
Journal out your problems….
It is great to get your feelings on the page. It is best to do so either at the beginning or end of the day. Once it is in a notebook, it has cleared out “the muck” and now there is room for new thoughts.
Digital Detox….
I say this a ton. Everyone knows not to watch the news on TV all day. However, there are micro- detoxes to do. Ask yourself how often you are listening to other people’s problems. Yes, it can be helpful; however, when every podcast is an advice podcast, it makes it seem like life is full of endless problems. Balance out your rotation with uplifting motivating podcasts.
Who are you surrounded with?….
How many fires are you putting out for other people? It is not a bad idea to do a gradual fade-out for certain friendships. Your test should be how you feel when you leave the hang-out or what your gut reaction is when they text. These days, it is very easy to demote people and to “be busy.” Most will get the hint.
Bottom Line….
Bettering yourself can be in micro-shifts that can make a huge impact. Living situations, jobs, and friendships can shape your stress level and quality of life. All are temporary and fixable. For anyone currently in therapy, have a solid plan for the hour session. You may also consider only signing up for a few sessions versus an unending commitment. Coaches and mentors should be utilized more. With coaches you can be focused on one goal such as career or your love life. The free ways to feel better are exercise, giving yourself a routine, and journaling. Lastly, ask yourself what you are mentally consuming, such as the news or even podcasts that are not productive or motivating.
Mostly Casual 