Masculine And Feminine Energy

Every person, male or female, possesses both masculine and feminine energy. Nowadays, women run companies and solve daily dilemmas which result in being in the masculine much of the time. As far as dating goes, it results in women staying in the masculine role and trying to steer the relationship and leaning forward. A masculine man by nature wants to hunt for his prey, so when a woman is doing all the work, he becomes lazy and resorts to being in his feminine energy. Power dynamics are very important in sustaining a relationship. Deep down, women want a man who works hard to keep the relationship afloat. Check out the channel “Commitment Connection” on YouTube, there are so many videos on this topic.

What is feminine energy really?….

When you receive, wait, and experience the moment, that is feminine energy. Trying to move things along by texting, asking him out, etc, are in your masculine energy. Expressing how you are feeling in the moment, responding, and appreciating are feminine. Being future-centric and complaining about the past are masculine. Staying in the present moment and going with the flow is feminine.

What language are you using when you speak to him….

Constantly complaining or bragging is not sexy to him. He is not impressed by how much money you make, unless, of course, he is trying to use you as a sugar mama. You can’t be talking about the same things you would discuss with your friends or co-workers. Everything needs to seem light. Trust that he can carry a conversation and be ok with a few silences.

Are you super sarcastic and snarky?….

Are your “jokes” not landing? Flirting is not making fun of him. Also, being self-deprecating doesn’t work as well as you think. You can be humble without making yourself sound incompetent.

Why so serious?….

Men want to feel good in the moment. In the early stages of dating laugh, create witty banter, talk about silly topics.

Even thinking and obsessing are masculine…..

You might think there is no harm in obsessing about a new guy and plotting and planning your next move. Even if you aren’t texting him and making moves, you are still energetically in masculine mode.

Passive reciprocation is the worst….

Again, when a woman is in her masculine energy mode, a man switches over to his feminine. It will not feel satisfying when he never reaches out, but will text back out of boredom. It gets frustrating when the relationship is always at a standstill.

This is why you need options….

It’s never a good idea to be laser-focused on one guy. Plus, if he decides to ghost, you will be devastated. It’s easier to go with the flow when you are talking to multiple men.

The “girlfriend material” thought includes a feminine woman…..

If you are constantly in your masculine, then he is more likely to keep you as a sexual option, yet never take you on dates. Being “one of the boys” results in you being stuck in the friend zone.

Bottom Line….

Nowadays, feminine energy is not taught or encouraged. It might be seen as weak or not in touch with today’s climate and society, but being in feminine energy is extremely powerful. Just because it isn’t loud, doesn’t mean there isn’t a quiet confidence. Personally, I struggle with being in my feminine; I actually enjoy the chase and winning a guy over. It’s something that requires intention and fighting against certain instincts. Practicing feminine energy is taking a step back and receiving rather than pursuing.

Feng Shui Part 2: Attracting What You Want

The concept of the law of attraction is somewhat abstract. Mainly, the advice is simply to think positive and avoid negative thoughts. But how can we actually manifest a better dating life?

Set your intention….

Even a simple goal, like going on more dates, is good. It’s easier to start small and work your way to bigger goals. Keep your focus on one thing at a time. It will get overwhelming to try to manifest a husband off the bat.

How does Feng Shui help?…

It’s great to have a visual representation of what your goals are. I wrote in the previous article how to Feng Shui your bedroom to attract a partner. Basically, the room needs to look romantic, have matching lamps and night stands, made tp look as if a couple lives there. A big mistake is hanging dark curtains or pushing your bed against the wall. Also, your bathroom is not the place to display your hopes and dreams and vision boards. As an artist, I never put my own art in the bathroom. You will “flush” away your goals if you do so.

Vision boards….

It might feel like you are in grade school making a collage, but it’s very therapeutic. Make sure the board isn’t all over the place. Stick to one topic for a while, such as meeting a great guy, and make a visual representation of that.

Cut negative friends out of your life….

If you are surrounded by man-hating friends, it’s not helpful to be absorbing that.

Your dating life might not actually be that bad….

You might be doing well in dating, yet you keep focusing on all the bad dates. Some women get derailed by one bad date and then refuse to meet another man.

Words have power….

If you are complaining to your therapist about all your bad dates, you will attract more bad dates. The best thing to do is to simply unmatch and move on. Not every date needs to be analyzed. When you do speak about your dating life, frame it in a way that’s positive. For example, say “I’m enjoying talking to new people.” Come from a place of gratitude.

Have a dating mantra….

It’s good to have a go-to phrase to say to yourself when times are tough. Say the statement in the present tense, such as, “I’m a catch,” for example. Pick one that really empowers you and is easy to remember and repeat.

Bottom Line….

Making decisions on fear and being in a scarcity mindset will set you back. I have been stuck in bad dating patterns for years. You have to believe you are dateable and that there are more than enough men to go around. Having visual representations of your goals will put them in your subconscious. It’s the same concept as feeling overwhelmed by a messy room, your brain absorbs the vibe and flow of a surrounding. Get creative with making a vision board, put it in a place that you will look at often.

Feng Shui Your Way To Love

Feng Shui, in simple terms, is a Chinese philosophy based on flow of energy and intention. It can get extremely complicated and has a lot of rules. I want to keep it simple and based on relationships and love. A year ago when I moved to my new place, I decided to give it a try. I have found that it actually has worked. For a good introduction, listen to the Feng Shui episode of the podcast “Self Helpless.” If you are a believer in the “law of attraction” and energy flow then this would be great to try out.

What is Feng Shui exactly?

Picture a birds’ eye map of a room. Each section represents a component of your life. (I would look up Feng Shui maps ). Starting with the first section, it goes clockwise: wealth, fame, love, creativity, travel, career, spirituality, and family. At the center is health.

So, how can Feng Shui help my love life?

When you have a subconscious intention, it can appear in your conscious life. It’s sort of like putting up a vision board. I spend much of my time in my room so my entire room represents everything. If you decide to Feng Shui your whole house or just your room, it’s still a good idea to decorate your bedroom with romance in mind.

Think about color…

The colors that represent love are…you guessed it… pink. It doesn’t do you any favors to have grey and black sheets. Think roses and pinks and reds. Maybe you want your curtains to be a girly soft pink color or have rose-patterned pillow cases. Use the color sparingly. You don’t want your room to look like a Pepto-Bismol bottle.

What about art….

It’s important to have art work of couples. If you have a picture of a girl standing alone it will represent you being single. It should not be pornographic. I have some beautiful work of couples embracing and the phase, “I love you” in French.

Bed placement….

It’s not a good idea to have the side of your bed pushed against a wall. In a sense, your bed needs to look like a couple lives there. I would have a night stand on each side. Maybe have matching side lamps. You are creating space for a future boyfriend.

What about crystals….

The crystal that represents love is the rose quartz. It’s a beautiful pink stone. If you believe in crystals then meditate activating the heart chakra while holding the crystals or placing them on your chest.

If you have an on suite bathroom….

Never put any love stuff in the bathroom, or any wealth things. This is important. You have to think what a bathroom represents. It will flush away your hopes and dreams. I have art in my bathroom, but its not my own art and it’s very neutral.

Bottom Line….

You don’t have to make your room look like Valentine’s Day threw up everywhere. Do think about colors and soft fabrics. It should look romantic. If you hate baby pink you can use darker pinks and reds. Your bedroom says a lot about you and your goals and intentions without realizing it. I am very careful to not let my bedroom get messy.

It’s worth it to get curtains. I hate the cheap blinds that come with every apartment. Take the extra step and get beautiful curtains. I actually like to add decorative scarves too.

I know to some people all this seems like a bunch of baloney. If it’s not for you then that’s totally fine! Personally, I think your mindset effects future outcomes. I have had bad years and good years and it really had to do with my intention and negative or positive energy.