I told you how to get a comic to notice you, what do you do when you actually get him? Truthfully, it’s not as glamorous and hilarious as you think it will be. He probably travels every weekend and your role is half-cheerleader, half-girlfriend. The most frustrating part is he probably doesn’t think you are the funny one in the relationship. I got a slap on the wrist (metaphorically) for “work shopping” his joke. I was dating a comedian at the time and learned real quick that this is not a group project. Here are some facts about dating a comedian…..
He travels…..
If he is local, he still travels around to other cities. Bigger comedians will be getting on planes to travel. This can be good and bad depending on your attachment style. Avoidants are probably the best fit, since you need your space. Any attachment style that is anxious will unravel every weekend.
His persona on stage is probably the opposite of his true personality…..
The mean insult comics are usually sweethearts off stage. When you perform you need to channel a character to get though it. On the flip side, the nice boy act could mean he is a pill to deal with in real life.
Rarely does he date female comedians…..
It certainly does happen. However, you don’t need to be threatened by his female comic friends. Mainly because men don’t really value humor the way women do. It isn’t a trait they necessarily look for, or need in a woman.
He might work you into his act…..
Jokes come from observations that surround him. You are around him a lot so he might decide to use something you said or did in a story. Whether it’s flattering or not ( real talk: it won’t be flattering).
Only comment on jokes if he seeks your opinion…..
Your role as girlfriend is to NOT to help him with his act. Sure, maybe some girlfriends do in certain dynamics. However, do not give him feedback when he isn’t asking. It will result in fights and him icing you out.
Ask why you want to date him…..
It’s easier to date then do. Are you living vicariously though him when in reality your dream is to get on stage? Really examine your true motives before you jump in and become his ghost writer. Just write your own jokes and be brave.
Bottom Line…..
Listen….I am very much projecting and generalizing. Of course there are comedians who adore their girlfriends and worship the ground they walk on. I will say they are the easiest group to approach in public after a show. Praise and flattery can get you everywhere as long as you look good. Most of the relationship will be blind trust and not every personality type can handle it. Your motive might be to be the comedian, not just date. Take a step back and figure out your true intentions before you get entangled in a relationship.
Mostly Casual 