Dating is social. it’s a skill that is not taught in school, but more of an on-the-job training. I have been in plenty of social situations in college and beyond. If you pick the wrong bunch to hit the town, it will be regrettable. You need a strong alliance with people who are going to build you up. Choose wisely on who has your best interest. Some women will be competitive and sabotage you. So, who should you invite to girl’s night out?….
What is the purpose of wing women?….
Men have had “wingmen” for eons. The friend is there to make the assist so his friend can get some action. He makes sacrifices like chatting up the less attractive friend or hyping him up. Sometimes improv can be involved and a friend can act as the bumbling idiot while the other friend swoops in and “saves her.” Women, however, are less theatrical and will be less likely to make sacrifices to get her friend a hook up. However, it’s still helpful to go out in a group to attract attention.
Picking wing women…..
A group of three is better than just one other person. Make sure everyone is on the same page. Honestly, I would have a real conversation with your friends on what the intent of the night is. A lot of girls just like to go out and dance and get attention and some do not want men approaching them.
—Beware the protective friend….
She is a sweet girl, but is a little too co-dependent. She is too concerned about everyone’s safety and how late it is. Yet, she can be a little too motherly and prevent you from letting loose.
—Beware the competitive friend….
If you are wearing a mini-skirt, so does she, except she also wears a low-cup top. If a guy approaches you, she will swoop in to turn the attention on her. She will ask boys to do a body shot off her belly button and jump on top of the bar and flash everyone.
—Beware the whiny friend....
She suddenly gets deathly ill at any convenient moment. For some reason, she never drives herself and had to make a scene worthy of a soap opera just so she has someone to drive her home by 9:30pm
—Beware the co-worker….
When you are on off-hours with a co-worker you might feel pressure to be on your best behavior. Follow that instinct. Gossip and slandering your name around the office won’t feel great.
––Beware the puke girl…..
There is always that girl who cannot hold her liquor. She could have a drop of alcohol and be puking in the bathroom or on the sidewalk. You probably wasted nights holding her hair back and checking on her.
Don’t use a special night with friends to pick up guys…..
If it’s your friend’s birthday, bridal shower, or celebrating her promotion at work… just cool it for a night. If men approach you, just be coy and say, “tonight I am just with friends, but nice meeting you.” It’s a classy move that might get you a future date. But seriously, even if it’s a girl’s night don’t focus on the cute guys. You need to prioritize your girlfriends for as long as you have them.
Leave your coupled-up friends out of it…..
She might be eager to “find you a man” while swiping viciously on Tinder with your phone. Or she will send you on suicide missions to hit on guys at the pool table. If her relationship is on the rocks, she might want to live vicariously though you. If she is happy in her relationship, the last thing she wants to do is to go to a dirty dive bar when she can watch Netflix with her man.
Have your own transportation….
Can’t stress this enough! Never be anyone’s transportation. If your friends want to call it a night, stay out a little later and feel out the scene.
These are key people to befriend. They are more likely to help you out and make you look good. These folks have no skin in the game and can be used as great buffers. On top of that, you look social for having them.
How to make bar friends….
Become a regular at a bar. Be open to talk to someone. If there is one person sitting at a table, ask if anyone is sitting with them. You can also ask quick advice about what drink to get or if anything is happening tonight. Ease into talking, and before you know it you made a friend. People are at bars to be social so they will welcome a stranger talking.
Do you actually need wing women?….
Showing up alone to a bar or concert might be super-intimidating, yet you only need a friend buffer for maybe ten minutes before you feel comfortable. You will regret dragging your roommate out who needs to study. Just go alone; you are going to be ok. People will want to talk to you more and not feel awkward or intimidated by a group of friends.
Choose wisely on picking who to bring for girl’s night out. In my experience you are just better off going by yourself. I have been guilty of being the bad wing woman. If you have a “every woman for herself” attitude, then you missed the point of being a wing woman. Personally, I would lean more towards the bar regulars. Make an effort to be more social in general and gain those introduction and small-talk skills. At the end of the day, you can’t blame other people for not landing a date. Yet, who you surround yourself with can give you a nice boost.